i couldn't make this up

I know I have a tendency to embellish for the sake of a good story, but I promise these next few posts will be absolutely true. Starting with: a topless Kimora Lee just plopped herself down in the lounge chair I vacated moments ago. (Vacated because it was no longer relaxing to be by the pool listening to a topless Kimora Lee.) All the men in our group have decided to have a snack poolside. curious, that.

The amFAR party last night was absolutely fantastic. I was not seated with Joaquin nor did I see him, but that did not prevent me from having a great time. More later after I get some lunch, but one highlight:

I was in the luxury porta-potty and heard a woman's voice calling, "Ivana? Ivana? IVANA? Is Ivana Trump in there?" I'd like to open up the floor for discussion as to what my clever reply should have been. At the time I knew I was missing an incredible opportunity for humor, but I just couldn't hold the ball gown off the floor and think clearly at the same time. . .